Match Reports - 2019/20
Click Old Tamponians 2019-20.
Wellcome Home - Changing Room Pitch. 15.03.2020.
3-7. ( Taj-2, Paul G.)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Finchy, Dilsy, Taj, Tonksy, Baby, Smudge, Roy, Jon, Paul T. ( Tim: Ref)
It was the last game before Lockdown - a bit of a rout. When we pulled a couple back we seemed in with a shout. But we’d started badly- the team all over the place. Three down in minutes the young striker had pace. But we should have done better - Roy told us so Jon could have scored and Dilsy decided to go. We kept pushing forward playing out from the back Baby, Tonksy, Paul T to Taj, ball passed into the onion sack.
The second half started better for us Baby’s corner G’s bullet header-no fuss. With their younger goal scoring striker temporarily rested. We surged forward their defence repeatedly tested. Taj’s header clipped the bar and Paul T rattled it too. But the oppo weren’t sporting they knew what to do. Back came the young forward to again break through.
Taj, (MoM), got his second- it was never enough. Our older team just ran out of puff. In the bar though we had the usual good time. A sense of perspective: their striker is only 29.
As people drank up and got ready to go. When we’d play again we just didn’t know. There were 8 matches scheduled for the rest of the season. But they’d never be played - the virus the reason.
Wellcome Home - Changing Room Pitch. 15.03.2020.
3-7. ( Taj-2, Paul G.)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Finchy, Dilsy, Taj, Tonksy, Baby, Smudge, Roy, Jon, Paul T. ( Tim: Ref)
It was the last game before Lockdown - a bit of a rout. When we pulled a couple back we seemed in with a shout. But we’d started badly- the team all over the place. Three down in minutes the young striker had pace. But we should have done better - Roy told us so Jon could have scored and Dilsy decided to go. We kept pushing forward playing out from the back Baby, Tonksy, Paul T to Taj, ball passed into the onion sack.
The second half started better for us Baby’s corner G’s bullet header-no fuss. With their younger goal scoring striker temporarily rested. We surged forward their defence repeatedly tested. Taj’s header clipped the bar and Paul T rattled it too. But the oppo weren’t sporting they knew what to do. Back came the young forward to again break through.
Taj, (MoM), got his second- it was never enough. Our older team just ran out of puff. In the bar though we had the usual good time. A sense of perspective: their striker is only 29.
As people drank up and got ready to go. When we’d play again we just didn’t know. There were 8 matches scheduled for the rest of the season. But they’d never be played - the virus the reason.
Old Tamponians Match Reports 2019-20
Wellcome. Beckenham Tennis and Cricket Club. 27.01.20
3-3. Paul T., Mike, Doyley.
Team: Mark, Chris, Baby, Matt, Scholesy, Tonksy, Paul G, Paul T, Graham, Doyley, Mike, Tim.
In a Sentence: End to end stuff.
In a Word: Eventful.
Players’ Player- chosen by Tonksy. Paul G: For his all round leadership, work rate and physical presence and an assist. Plus- he’s a big f***er!!!
Mark’s Man/Men: Subbuteo football at its best, quality that brings the crowds flocking back. Plenty of entertainment, shots on target, excellent saves, the woodwork helping out, some crunching challenges- and some of them legitimate, penalty shouts and some great finishes. Millwall midfield dynamo Tonksy gets the nod.
(What exactly does Mark see from the back!!??! )
Goal of the Game: Three very good ones: Paul running on to Tim’s defence splitting assist (fortunately Doyley didn’t read it and get in the way.) drawing the keeper and finishing decisively.
Mike smacking home after good play from the back-possibly starting from Mark’s catch from a corner-with Paul G playing the final ball. Ruled out due to excessive sprint from Mike after the net bulged! Clearly the fastest he’s ever moved!
The winner: Doyley- no time to think banged it home having found himself, surprisingly, in the right place at the right time! Graham- on one of the few occasions in the second half when he received the ball and passed over the midfield to Mike. His first time cross reached Paul who managed to nod it straight down to Doyley to crash home. A quality and thoroughly deserved equaliser.
Top Tackle: Most memorable was the most violent of Baby’s hacks that was not only nowhere near the ball but led to self inflicted bruises and an inevitable penalty. Perhaps he was disorientated by Matt repeatedly calling him ‘Todge’.
OSCDT: ( Top passing/Skill.) : Tim overcoming both his early entry into the game and dodgy club socks, cleverly missing out Doyley and putting the ball where it needed to be for Paul to run on to and open our account.
Moments and Quotes: Despite three fine goals and much else the moment of the game was in the opening minutes: Scholesy, with neither the ball or a player near to him, inexplicably falling to the ground. After Smudge’s superb Man Who Fell to Earth effort the previous match- tripping himself up yet convincing the ref he’d been fouled Scholesy was clearly trying to put himself forward for an end of season trophy. A few minutes later a cross from the right was too much for his hamstring.
“He’s shit for 99% of the time and then he finishes like that!”
An indecent assault by the keeper late on Mike gave the ref another penalty shout to ignore.
Graham, again, upset that he didn’t see much of the ball.
Not only a busy game for Mark ‘rushing’ (running through treacle?) out to thwart pacy forwards, making some smart saves but his kicks comfortably reached the oppo half.
Plenty of good performances with everybody contributing well and having at least one highlight moment. Matt, Baby, and Chris dealt with very pacy and young forwards and attacking midfielders very well. Paul G bossed the middle of the park and only missed a winning header because the ball was ‘too hard’. Excellent work from Paul T too, scoring, creating a number of chances and providing the vital assist.
Wellcome. Beckenham Tennis and Cricket Club. 27.01.20
3-3. Paul T., Mike, Doyley.
Team: Mark, Chris, Baby, Matt, Scholesy, Tonksy, Paul G, Paul T, Graham, Doyley, Mike, Tim.
In a Sentence: End to end stuff.
In a Word: Eventful.
Players’ Player- chosen by Tonksy. Paul G: For his all round leadership, work rate and physical presence and an assist. Plus- he’s a big f***er!!!
Mark’s Man/Men: Subbuteo football at its best, quality that brings the crowds flocking back. Plenty of entertainment, shots on target, excellent saves, the woodwork helping out, some crunching challenges- and some of them legitimate, penalty shouts and some great finishes. Millwall midfield dynamo Tonksy gets the nod.
(What exactly does Mark see from the back!!??! )
Goal of the Game: Three very good ones: Paul running on to Tim’s defence splitting assist (fortunately Doyley didn’t read it and get in the way.) drawing the keeper and finishing decisively.
Mike smacking home after good play from the back-possibly starting from Mark’s catch from a corner-with Paul G playing the final ball. Ruled out due to excessive sprint from Mike after the net bulged! Clearly the fastest he’s ever moved!
The winner: Doyley- no time to think banged it home having found himself, surprisingly, in the right place at the right time! Graham- on one of the few occasions in the second half when he received the ball and passed over the midfield to Mike. His first time cross reached Paul who managed to nod it straight down to Doyley to crash home. A quality and thoroughly deserved equaliser.
Top Tackle: Most memorable was the most violent of Baby’s hacks that was not only nowhere near the ball but led to self inflicted bruises and an inevitable penalty. Perhaps he was disorientated by Matt repeatedly calling him ‘Todge’.
OSCDT: ( Top passing/Skill.) : Tim overcoming both his early entry into the game and dodgy club socks, cleverly missing out Doyley and putting the ball where it needed to be for Paul to run on to and open our account.
Moments and Quotes: Despite three fine goals and much else the moment of the game was in the opening minutes: Scholesy, with neither the ball or a player near to him, inexplicably falling to the ground. After Smudge’s superb Man Who Fell to Earth effort the previous match- tripping himself up yet convincing the ref he’d been fouled Scholesy was clearly trying to put himself forward for an end of season trophy. A few minutes later a cross from the right was too much for his hamstring.
“He’s shit for 99% of the time and then he finishes like that!”
An indecent assault by the keeper late on Mike gave the ref another penalty shout to ignore.
Graham, again, upset that he didn’t see much of the ball.
Not only a busy game for Mark ‘rushing’ (running through treacle?) out to thwart pacy forwards, making some smart saves but his kicks comfortably reached the oppo half.
Plenty of good performances with everybody contributing well and having at least one highlight moment. Matt, Baby, and Chris dealt with very pacy and young forwards and attacking midfielders very well. Paul G bossed the middle of the park and only missed a winning header because the ball was ‘too hard’. Excellent work from Paul T too, scoring, creating a number of chances and providing the vital assist.
Old Tamponians Match Reports 2019-20
West Farleigh The Quaggy. 19.01.20
4-6. Mike 3, Chris (pen)
Team: Mark, Chris, Finchy, Baby, Jon, Tonksy, Paul G, The Squire, Smudge, Graham, Mike, Steve R. (Tim: Ref)
In a Sentence: Secret Santa in the bar and several gifts on the pitch.
Players’ Player (chosen by Finchy). Mike - a first half hat trick and a lot of work off the ball too- characterised by his third goal, closing down the keeper, intercepting the clearance and smashing home. All was looking good at that point!
Mick’s Man: Our centre forward, Michael, who was constantly making himself available, always ready to receive the ball and the Pope Francis calendar. Two early goals and the hat trick goal as described above and all in the first 45 minutes. Not sure what happened to him in the second half.
Goal of the Game: Mike’s second – ball played around and out of defence leading to some neat interplay between Tonksy and Jon. Tonksy slipped the ball between the defenders. Mike at the edge of the box took a touch and fired into the far corner; excellent team goal!
OSCDT. (Top passing/Skill.) The treble drag back and two Cruyff turns by Smudger bamboozling several Farleigh players and bringing gasps from team mates. Wow! Belle described it as ‘Bipolar football by Smudge - once in a lifetime weaving’.
Made up for several misplaced passes in the first half when simple lay-offs were the better option.
Top Tackle: Dean for West Farleigh put himself about – far too vigorously for several Old Tamponians – so Paul G’s forceful challenge gave a few victims pleasure. (Tim was obviously reffing to 1970s interpretations!) Chris, Smudge and, possibly, Jon could show the scars.
Moments and Quotes: Baby brings a £90 bottle of Islay Single Malt and shows better marksmanship in the bar with the toilet dart gun game than he did on the pitch. Great volley into the side netting though! Roy successfully trades the gun game for the ‘Indoor Insect Flykiller’. Tonksy makes an effort going to the Millwall shop for his Secret Santa gifts. Great effort to get off the ground and head the ball away just before it crossed the line though! The two season tickets for the Den are, of course, turned down by all.
Graham sportingly suggests (again!!) that he’s not sure it’s a penalty.
Mike’s opening goal was a good one too driving across the keeper and in off the far post with Graham claiming: ‘It was my runs that created the space. It’s all up here!’
Finchy again stands out in a poorly groomed and follicly challenged side- such lovely hair.
Chris is awarded top marks by Karen for gifting Tim the Jamie C**t Oliver cookbook ‘Veg’.
Felt like a good contest at half time. Was the deciding factor The Squire being forced off by injury or the shift to 4-4-2 and the consequent repositioning of personnel!?? It should also be noted that Steve R came on for the second half and was clearly thinking about his loved one’s loss or at least his upcoming trip to Johannesburg for the final test. Should have kept playing football……..
West Farleigh The Quaggy. 19.01.20
4-6. Mike 3, Chris (pen)
Team: Mark, Chris, Finchy, Baby, Jon, Tonksy, Paul G, The Squire, Smudge, Graham, Mike, Steve R. (Tim: Ref)
In a Sentence: Secret Santa in the bar and several gifts on the pitch.
Players’ Player (chosen by Finchy). Mike - a first half hat trick and a lot of work off the ball too- characterised by his third goal, closing down the keeper, intercepting the clearance and smashing home. All was looking good at that point!
Mick’s Man: Our centre forward, Michael, who was constantly making himself available, always ready to receive the ball and the Pope Francis calendar. Two early goals and the hat trick goal as described above and all in the first 45 minutes. Not sure what happened to him in the second half.
Goal of the Game: Mike’s second – ball played around and out of defence leading to some neat interplay between Tonksy and Jon. Tonksy slipped the ball between the defenders. Mike at the edge of the box took a touch and fired into the far corner; excellent team goal!
OSCDT. (Top passing/Skill.) The treble drag back and two Cruyff turns by Smudger bamboozling several Farleigh players and bringing gasps from team mates. Wow! Belle described it as ‘Bipolar football by Smudge - once in a lifetime weaving’.
Made up for several misplaced passes in the first half when simple lay-offs were the better option.
Top Tackle: Dean for West Farleigh put himself about – far too vigorously for several Old Tamponians – so Paul G’s forceful challenge gave a few victims pleasure. (Tim was obviously reffing to 1970s interpretations!) Chris, Smudge and, possibly, Jon could show the scars.
Moments and Quotes: Baby brings a £90 bottle of Islay Single Malt and shows better marksmanship in the bar with the toilet dart gun game than he did on the pitch. Great volley into the side netting though! Roy successfully trades the gun game for the ‘Indoor Insect Flykiller’. Tonksy makes an effort going to the Millwall shop for his Secret Santa gifts. Great effort to get off the ground and head the ball away just before it crossed the line though! The two season tickets for the Den are, of course, turned down by all.
Graham sportingly suggests (again!!) that he’s not sure it’s a penalty.
Mike’s opening goal was a good one too driving across the keeper and in off the far post with Graham claiming: ‘It was my runs that created the space. It’s all up here!’
Finchy again stands out in a poorly groomed and follicly challenged side- such lovely hair.
Chris is awarded top marks by Karen for gifting Tim the Jamie C**t Oliver cookbook ‘Veg’.
Felt like a good contest at half time. Was the deciding factor The Squire being forced off by injury or the shift to 4-4-2 and the consequent repositioning of personnel!?? It should also be noted that Steve R came on for the second half and was clearly thinking about his loved one’s loss or at least his upcoming trip to Johannesburg for the final test. Should have kept playing football……..
Old Tamponians Match Reports 2019-20
Charter Diamond . Hall Place. 12.01.20
W 1-0 (O.G. - even Graham is not seeking to claim this though it was his fine cross that led to the game’s only goal) .
Team: Mark, Chris, Finchy, Baby, Jon, The Squire, Smudge, Graham, Doyley, Paul, Mike, Tonksy, Steve R, Tim Roy and Scholesy and Crofton Neil and hound:supporters.
Summary: Quality of football matched the quality of the pitch. Only a goal like that could settle a match like this!
Players’ Player- chosen by Nipples. A very difficult choice: all in the defence were outstanding. Some hard work by those in midfield. Finchy wins it for his reading of the game and winning many headers; also for his lovely hair.
Mike’s Man: Going with Finchy-attacked everything and very little got past him. Have we finally guided him to the true footballing light? Or will his Young Vet team mates see it as joining the dark side!?!?
The Goal: An irrepressible surge down the left by Graham beating several players several times getting to the byline, beating one of them again and crossing with precision over the head of Mike at the near post, above the waving keeper and striking the middle of the cross bar so that the ball fell to their left back who under no pressure volleyed home with precision and style.
Top Tackle: Baby sliding tackle with their under 30 forward closing down on the ball. Having not quite pushed the ball to safety a slight upward movement ensured that the forward would provide no imminent danger.
Top Clearance: Sliding clearance by Chris: a rare and late attack beat our offside calls giving their forward the chance to draw Mark and square the ball to his partner: the equaliser seemed certain. Chris moving faster than in most driving lessons snuffed out the danger with a dramatic slide getting the vital contact that whizzed the ball past the post. As Graham pointed out he was closer to scoring than when he failed to nod into the oppo net from point blank range in the first half.
Moments and Quotes: Tonksy’s powerful shot-actually reaches the goal. Jon sets a personal best for step over turns. Doyley and Steve R show solid holiday fitness. Smudge several times (in open play) gets close to the half way line. Keeper makes a great save from Paul’s free kick but the same player flicks over the bar from a couple of yards after Nipples’s great run and cross. Mike has an ‘interesting’ series of strikes but -after a Cruyff turn- puts in the perfect cross which Chris barely touches.Could have opened the flood gates! The Squire despite selling Smudge short with an under hit pass that should have led to an oppo goal claims he’s the architect of another win by winning the toss and choosing ends. Another clean sheet for Mark – the fourth in the last 7 games- with good positioning throughout and a smart first half near post save. Doyley makes the interesting choice of eying the defender and ignoring the excellent through ball that should have allowed him to run in on goal.
Two teams refusing to score……and last year every Charter effort went in. How things change!
Charter Diamond . Hall Place. 12.01.20
W 1-0 (O.G. - even Graham is not seeking to claim this though it was his fine cross that led to the game’s only goal) .
Team: Mark, Chris, Finchy, Baby, Jon, The Squire, Smudge, Graham, Doyley, Paul, Mike, Tonksy, Steve R, Tim Roy and Scholesy and Crofton Neil and hound:supporters.
Summary: Quality of football matched the quality of the pitch. Only a goal like that could settle a match like this!
Players’ Player- chosen by Nipples. A very difficult choice: all in the defence were outstanding. Some hard work by those in midfield. Finchy wins it for his reading of the game and winning many headers; also for his lovely hair.
Mike’s Man: Going with Finchy-attacked everything and very little got past him. Have we finally guided him to the true footballing light? Or will his Young Vet team mates see it as joining the dark side!?!?
The Goal: An irrepressible surge down the left by Graham beating several players several times getting to the byline, beating one of them again and crossing with precision over the head of Mike at the near post, above the waving keeper and striking the middle of the cross bar so that the ball fell to their left back who under no pressure volleyed home with precision and style.
Top Tackle: Baby sliding tackle with their under 30 forward closing down on the ball. Having not quite pushed the ball to safety a slight upward movement ensured that the forward would provide no imminent danger.
Top Clearance: Sliding clearance by Chris: a rare and late attack beat our offside calls giving their forward the chance to draw Mark and square the ball to his partner: the equaliser seemed certain. Chris moving faster than in most driving lessons snuffed out the danger with a dramatic slide getting the vital contact that whizzed the ball past the post. As Graham pointed out he was closer to scoring than when he failed to nod into the oppo net from point blank range in the first half.
Moments and Quotes: Tonksy’s powerful shot-actually reaches the goal. Jon sets a personal best for step over turns. Doyley and Steve R show solid holiday fitness. Smudge several times (in open play) gets close to the half way line. Keeper makes a great save from Paul’s free kick but the same player flicks over the bar from a couple of yards after Nipples’s great run and cross. Mike has an ‘interesting’ series of strikes but -after a Cruyff turn- puts in the perfect cross which Chris barely touches.Could have opened the flood gates! The Squire despite selling Smudge short with an under hit pass that should have led to an oppo goal claims he’s the architect of another win by winning the toss and choosing ends. Another clean sheet for Mark – the fourth in the last 7 games- with good positioning throughout and a smart first half near post save. Doyley makes the interesting choice of eying the defender and ignoring the excellent through ball that should have allowed him to run in on goal.
Two teams refusing to score……and last year every Charter effort went in. How things change!
Catford Wanderers. Samuel Montagu AstroTurf. 22.12.19
Lost 3-5. ( Taj (2), Paul T.)
Team: Mark, Dave, Chris, Steve R, Smudge, Taj, Jon, Tonksy, Graham, Scholesy, Mike, Paul, The Squire, Doyley. ( Tim: Ref.)
Players’ Player- chosen by The Squire. Jon/Jonny: managed to keep the lively ( young) Catford midfield at bay; always available for a pass- even if it was from Graham’s right foot. Brought us back from 3-0 down and a potential cricket score with his energy and tackling.
Mark’s Man/Men: The penultimate Christmas game ended in defeat but we got a match on the famous sloping astroturf. A great comeback to level from 3-0 down ended in a 5-3 defeat to a young looking Catford Wanderers.
Joint MOM :Goes to Steve R and Taj for their performances in defence and midfield.
Goal of the Game: A choice between a team goal and an individual strike. Starting the comeback- Graham to Chris pushing out of defence into their half; on to Jon who fed Scholesy. His fine turn set up a measured assist for Taj to finish decisively.
Bringing us level at 3-3: Paul clipping precisely over the keeper from 25 yards.
Moments and Quotes: After being beaten twice from distance in the first half Mark pulled off another fine save blocking a close range drive with a big right hand and hanging on. Still in the game.
Some chances missed- one from Scholesy and surely jug avoidance from Taj with a header he’d normally put away.
Out of the game: no danger- our goal kick, Graham sees Paul in space on the halfway line hits the ball directly at the advancing Smudge cushioned off that Baloo Bear bum to fall perfectly for the forward to stroke into the unguarded net. Smudge did not enjoy being the butt of the jokes but stated ‘I’m like the Kardashians: I wear one of those things to enhance my buttocks’. Would it have been different if Mobile Dave hadn’t (yet again!!) succumbed to injury bringing Smudge back into the fray?
Some second half bonding between Jon and Mike.
Tonksy inspiring the team before kick off : ‘I know that guy..he’s 39 and f****ng good!’
‘We are a SuperVets side.’ Catford manager puts forward some dubious justifications having jumped on the ‘young side’ hook Tim threw out as he left the bar.
A lot of character and effort from all involved so that we fought back in the first half and competed throughout. ( Nobody blames you Graham – could have been anyone setting up their winners!!)
Lost 3-5. ( Taj (2), Paul T.)
Team: Mark, Dave, Chris, Steve R, Smudge, Taj, Jon, Tonksy, Graham, Scholesy, Mike, Paul, The Squire, Doyley. ( Tim: Ref.)
Players’ Player- chosen by The Squire. Jon/Jonny: managed to keep the lively ( young) Catford midfield at bay; always available for a pass- even if it was from Graham’s right foot. Brought us back from 3-0 down and a potential cricket score with his energy and tackling.
Mark’s Man/Men: The penultimate Christmas game ended in defeat but we got a match on the famous sloping astroturf. A great comeback to level from 3-0 down ended in a 5-3 defeat to a young looking Catford Wanderers.
Joint MOM :Goes to Steve R and Taj for their performances in defence and midfield.
Goal of the Game: A choice between a team goal and an individual strike. Starting the comeback- Graham to Chris pushing out of defence into their half; on to Jon who fed Scholesy. His fine turn set up a measured assist for Taj to finish decisively.
Bringing us level at 3-3: Paul clipping precisely over the keeper from 25 yards.
Moments and Quotes: After being beaten twice from distance in the first half Mark pulled off another fine save blocking a close range drive with a big right hand and hanging on. Still in the game.
Some chances missed- one from Scholesy and surely jug avoidance from Taj with a header he’d normally put away.
Out of the game: no danger- our goal kick, Graham sees Paul in space on the halfway line hits the ball directly at the advancing Smudge cushioned off that Baloo Bear bum to fall perfectly for the forward to stroke into the unguarded net. Smudge did not enjoy being the butt of the jokes but stated ‘I’m like the Kardashians: I wear one of those things to enhance my buttocks’. Would it have been different if Mobile Dave hadn’t (yet again!!) succumbed to injury bringing Smudge back into the fray?
Some second half bonding between Jon and Mike.
Tonksy inspiring the team before kick off : ‘I know that guy..he’s 39 and f****ng good!’
‘We are a SuperVets side.’ Catford manager puts forward some dubious justifications having jumped on the ‘young side’ hook Tim threw out as he left the bar.
A lot of character and effort from all involved so that we fought back in the first half and competed throughout. ( Nobody blames you Graham – could have been anyone setting up their winners!!)
Charlton Rangers. Perry Street. 01.12.19
Lost 1-2. (Tonksy)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Steve R, Jon, The Squire, Smudge, Tonksy, Graham, Doyley, Mike. ( Tim: Lino)
Apparently sickness and injury had ripped through the team with Baby, Taj, Roy and Paul T all withdrawing despite the Squire’s eve of game exhortation to ‘Man up!’. A closer look at their politics showed the real reason: they wanted to support the glorious PM as he bravely faced questions on the Andrew Marr show. Whether they would have improved the team’s performance is debatable but it’s unlikely that they would have made it worse. After recent weeks this was more representative of the Tamps at their more ineffectual and complacent. Although we dominated possession we only occasionally tested the Charlton keeper and only showed consistent attacking football for periods in the second half.Often even simple passes were botched.
Two long range strikes and the ref giving the defenders the benefit of the ‘doubt’ over two forthright penalty claims were enough to end the run of 3 successive victories.
Oh well- at least the showers worked, Graham was back, the PM fully displayed all his qualities as leader and we enjoyed bar time back at the Roan.
Goal of the Game: A great dummy by Doyley and Tonksy smashed it in the back of the onion bag! This was made possible by Chris surging forward from the back demanding and completing a 1-2 with Jon who ( finally) found a teammate in the box.
Top Tackle: Bobby Moore- esque! Smudger’s words. Such timing and grace! Edge of the box, foot on the ball, up on his feet, pass laid off- forward still running.
Players’ Player: chosen by Mike- Nobody stood out – so nobody picked! We’ve been better than we were today- lots of running but final balls let us down as a collective.
Mick’s Men/ Man: Special mentions for:- Doyley- rather uniquely faced towards our goal for the entire game.
Chrissy-created mayhem as an old – fashioned inside right,
Smudger-spent most of the second half rolling in the mud.
Moments and Quotes: ‘I was hacked!’ Graham – not happy that the Ref saw no reason to blow his whistle for this assault either. ( He also wasn’t happy that his teammates weren’t passing to him in the second half; perhaps that was to do with the quality of his final ball in the first 45 minutes!!)
Mike’s new haircut and ‘groomed’ stubble…he and comedian Geoff Norcott have never been seen in the same room! ( Geoff and Sponge Bob Doyley- what a strike force!)
Obviously Smudge’s tackle was the standout but an excellent block from Steve R late on kept us in the game.
Chris claims a ‘second cousin assist’-see goal of the game. Is this a Dartford thing?!?
‘ He didn’t hit it that hard but he still managed to beat Mark for pace’. Great one on one save though after Paul G fell to earth.
Statto Smudge informs President Graham and those in the bar that we have now beaten Metrogas four times.
Oh yes, it’s Farnborough again next week!!
Lost 1-2. (Tonksy)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Steve R, Jon, The Squire, Smudge, Tonksy, Graham, Doyley, Mike. ( Tim: Lino)
Apparently sickness and injury had ripped through the team with Baby, Taj, Roy and Paul T all withdrawing despite the Squire’s eve of game exhortation to ‘Man up!’. A closer look at their politics showed the real reason: they wanted to support the glorious PM as he bravely faced questions on the Andrew Marr show. Whether they would have improved the team’s performance is debatable but it’s unlikely that they would have made it worse. After recent weeks this was more representative of the Tamps at their more ineffectual and complacent. Although we dominated possession we only occasionally tested the Charlton keeper and only showed consistent attacking football for periods in the second half.Often even simple passes were botched.
Two long range strikes and the ref giving the defenders the benefit of the ‘doubt’ over two forthright penalty claims were enough to end the run of 3 successive victories.
Oh well- at least the showers worked, Graham was back, the PM fully displayed all his qualities as leader and we enjoyed bar time back at the Roan.
Goal of the Game: A great dummy by Doyley and Tonksy smashed it in the back of the onion bag! This was made possible by Chris surging forward from the back demanding and completing a 1-2 with Jon who ( finally) found a teammate in the box.
Top Tackle: Bobby Moore- esque! Smudger’s words. Such timing and grace! Edge of the box, foot on the ball, up on his feet, pass laid off- forward still running.
Players’ Player: chosen by Mike- Nobody stood out – so nobody picked! We’ve been better than we were today- lots of running but final balls let us down as a collective.
Mick’s Men/ Man: Special mentions for:- Doyley- rather uniquely faced towards our goal for the entire game.
Chrissy-created mayhem as an old – fashioned inside right,
Smudger-spent most of the second half rolling in the mud.
Moments and Quotes: ‘I was hacked!’ Graham – not happy that the Ref saw no reason to blow his whistle for this assault either. ( He also wasn’t happy that his teammates weren’t passing to him in the second half; perhaps that was to do with the quality of his final ball in the first 45 minutes!!)
Mike’s new haircut and ‘groomed’ stubble…he and comedian Geoff Norcott have never been seen in the same room! ( Geoff and Sponge Bob Doyley- what a strike force!)
Obviously Smudge’s tackle was the standout but an excellent block from Steve R late on kept us in the game.
Chris claims a ‘second cousin assist’-see goal of the game. Is this a Dartford thing?!?
‘ He didn’t hit it that hard but he still managed to beat Mark for pace’. Great one on one save though after Paul G fell to earth.
Statto Smudge informs President Graham and those in the bar that we have now beaten Metrogas four times.
Oh yes, it’s Farnborough again next week!!
Farnborough Home- the Quaggy. 24.11.19
3-0. ( Scholesy, Own Goal- (Taj’s strike), Mike.)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Baby, Taj, Jon, Smudge, The Squire, Roy, Doyley, Mike, Scholesy, Tonksy, Steve R. Tim: Ref.
Perhaps inspired by the imminent launch of the Tory manifesto all involved showed a desire to get the game ‘done’. Outstanding work by the defence- despite Oven Ready Chris looking a little precarious to start with in his mouldies- was supported by full effort across the team. This effort occasionally manifested itself in inappropriate ways- Smudge’s professional foul “ just had to be done” whilst Baby’s late assault on their forward some 40 metres from goal didn’t quite fit this category. Doyley went well beyond vigourous competition in the last quarter and had to be removed: the need for yoga and mindfulness being ever more evident.
There were too many unnecessary flash points for a Senior Vets game- with both sides at fault – but it was in essence a good competitive match with decent football played. Farnborough’s finishing did not match their build up and we took our chances: it’s all about those marginals- or is it marginal gains?
Players’ Player- chosen by Chris: Scholesy- for annoying the opposition even more than us. The suggestion that Scholesy was disturbed by, and jealous of, Simon the Thesp’s early and intimate contact with Taj and so sought to draw attention to himself by all means and at every opportunity, cannot be wholly discounted.
(Also even though they deserve it we can’t keep giving the ‘award’ to Baby and/or PaulG.)
Mark’s Man/Men: In a great all round team performance bringing a second consecutive clean sheet the MoM goes to the diving Scholesy- for his goal, tracking back and constant, scything fouling!!
Goal of the Game: Got to be our first! Paul G’s free kick – given for a somewhat controversial handball - from just inside our half was driven deep into the box with Mike deftly delivering a cushioned pass into Scholesy’s path for a controlled left foot finish.
Moments and Quotes: ‘Just kick it you c**t!’ Some excellent interceptions from Tonksy – and this unfortunate interjection late in the game.( It was noted that: ‘Tonksy had to have a good game – or he was on his way out.’) At the end of the pre- game team talk and with a well established formation in place Roy lobbied for a 4-2-3-1. Perhaps this was still on his mind when he headed over from point blank range- wasting a brilliant cross from Doyley.
Steve R decides 12 on the pitch will be okay- then saves himself for an excellent second half part of which he spends talking to himself.
Erith turn up to play Avery Hill sporting their Kwikfit jackets.
Another fine clean sheet for the defence and Mark who made a number of smart saves – including of the swerving pile driver from distance by the centre half.
Jon has another strong game and was only marginally distracted by what he saw as scant protection from the Ref.
The Squire shows his class by showing you can boss the midfield without committing gratuitous – or perhaps any- fouls.
Taj denied another goal as his powerful strike was deflected past the keeper by an opponent’s impulsive leg swing.
Mike makes the game safe- eventually- allowing the keeper to block his first effort but then, and with defenders back as cover, driving the rebound home with aplomb. His 60th goal for the club!
Well done all- despite a lot more niggle than usual- perhaps the best performance of the season!
3-0. ( Scholesy, Own Goal- (Taj’s strike), Mike.)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Baby, Taj, Jon, Smudge, The Squire, Roy, Doyley, Mike, Scholesy, Tonksy, Steve R. Tim: Ref.
Perhaps inspired by the imminent launch of the Tory manifesto all involved showed a desire to get the game ‘done’. Outstanding work by the defence- despite Oven Ready Chris looking a little precarious to start with in his mouldies- was supported by full effort across the team. This effort occasionally manifested itself in inappropriate ways- Smudge’s professional foul “ just had to be done” whilst Baby’s late assault on their forward some 40 metres from goal didn’t quite fit this category. Doyley went well beyond vigourous competition in the last quarter and had to be removed: the need for yoga and mindfulness being ever more evident.
There were too many unnecessary flash points for a Senior Vets game- with both sides at fault – but it was in essence a good competitive match with decent football played. Farnborough’s finishing did not match their build up and we took our chances: it’s all about those marginals- or is it marginal gains?
Players’ Player- chosen by Chris: Scholesy- for annoying the opposition even more than us. The suggestion that Scholesy was disturbed by, and jealous of, Simon the Thesp’s early and intimate contact with Taj and so sought to draw attention to himself by all means and at every opportunity, cannot be wholly discounted.
(Also even though they deserve it we can’t keep giving the ‘award’ to Baby and/or PaulG.)
Mark’s Man/Men: In a great all round team performance bringing a second consecutive clean sheet the MoM goes to the diving Scholesy- for his goal, tracking back and constant, scything fouling!!
Goal of the Game: Got to be our first! Paul G’s free kick – given for a somewhat controversial handball - from just inside our half was driven deep into the box with Mike deftly delivering a cushioned pass into Scholesy’s path for a controlled left foot finish.
Moments and Quotes: ‘Just kick it you c**t!’ Some excellent interceptions from Tonksy – and this unfortunate interjection late in the game.( It was noted that: ‘Tonksy had to have a good game – or he was on his way out.’) At the end of the pre- game team talk and with a well established formation in place Roy lobbied for a 4-2-3-1. Perhaps this was still on his mind when he headed over from point blank range- wasting a brilliant cross from Doyley.
Steve R decides 12 on the pitch will be okay- then saves himself for an excellent second half part of which he spends talking to himself.
Erith turn up to play Avery Hill sporting their Kwikfit jackets.
Another fine clean sheet for the defence and Mark who made a number of smart saves – including of the swerving pile driver from distance by the centre half.
Jon has another strong game and was only marginally distracted by what he saw as scant protection from the Ref.
The Squire shows his class by showing you can boss the midfield without committing gratuitous – or perhaps any- fouls.
Taj denied another goal as his powerful strike was deflected past the keeper by an opponent’s impulsive leg swing.
Mike makes the game safe- eventually- allowing the keeper to block his first effort but then, and with defenders back as cover, driving the rebound home with aplomb. His 60th goal for the club!
Well done all- despite a lot more niggle than usual- perhaps the best performance of the season!
17.11. 2019
West Farleigh - Away.
W 3-0. ( Roy, Jon, Mike.)
Team: Mark TK, Taj,Chris, Baby, Steve R, Jon, The Squire, Smudge, Paul, Doyley, Mike, Roy, Tim.
The scoreline doesn’t really reflect a well contested game with West Farleigh enjoying at least equality in possession and putting us under sustained pressure particularly in the first period of the second half. We took our chances whilst the oppo’s strong build up play was not matched by effective work in and close to the box. Mark TK made several good saves but wasn’t called on to match the outstanding stuff of recent weeks.
It was good to see the oppo field an appropriately aged senior vets team and that our good players arrived early leaving the Citroen 500 Three as the latecomers. Roy didn’t bother with the changing room waiting for his teammates in the dug out having only earlier declared his participation via the WhatsApp group. Would he get on the pitch?
As usual we created a good chance for the oppo Baby putting Mark under intense pressure with a back pass; fortunately the chance was spurned. 0-0 at halftime despite some good opportunities for both sides- the best Jon running in on goal but choosing (or forgetting?) to shoot.
Strong defence – another striking feature of recent weeks- was needed in the third quarter and Smudge was clearly in pain – a result of his testing dietary regime. Roy had changed his request for 30 minutes game time to half of that and so was able to replace Jon- who moved into the middle- on the right side sparing Smudge further exertion; within moments the deadlock was broken! Mike set Paul free on the left and he surged in from the byline to arrow the ball across goal where Roy finished well – his first touch! Next it was Jon striking into the far corner from outside the box- perhaps the bobble off the laces gave it the required flight and dip. Mike completed the scoring although thoughtfully refused to add to the scoreline despite only having the keeper to beat. Back to back wins- giving us a record this season similar to Spurs’ when they sacked Pochettino.
Smudger’s Star. (Mark had to go straight from the ground.) A very good team performance with a few standouts: Jon, the Squire and Mike- but Baby just gets it.
Players’ Player- chosen by Baby: Baby has gone with: ‘ A fine team performance.’ Diplomacy at its finest!
Goal of the Game: According to ‘Senior Management’- this means Smudge and Tim- ( a combined 125 years of wisdom(!!!!) )- Jon’s goal has to be discounted as he miss hit his shot. Therefore Roy De Bruyne secures this category- a nice pass from Mike set Paul free on the left; an excellent low cross found Roy DB steaming in at the back post to finish with his first touch of the match.
Moments and Quotes: A first clean sheet of the season! Steady!!
‘The curious thing about West Farleigh is that it’s virtually impossible to score when one on one with the keeper’. ( Mike was ‘waiting for the whistle’ .Hmmm.) Chris – what a defender- takes one in the nuts yet again.It’s always him- such commitment!!
‘Mike! Mike! Look!!!!’ Taj crossing the half way line as Mike advances into the box! Perhaps he should have passed it back!
Sponge Bob Doyley got the full 90, did well and had a classic flick up and overhead.
Complete professionalism from Tim calling a very laborious substitution that saw him get a full two minutes on the pitch.- maintaining his 100% pass completion rate for the season.
‘What happened to Western Samoa?’
Sausage and chips, good beer and Dogger in the pub- the Good Intent.
West Farleigh - Away.
W 3-0. ( Roy, Jon, Mike.)
Team: Mark TK, Taj,Chris, Baby, Steve R, Jon, The Squire, Smudge, Paul, Doyley, Mike, Roy, Tim.
The scoreline doesn’t really reflect a well contested game with West Farleigh enjoying at least equality in possession and putting us under sustained pressure particularly in the first period of the second half. We took our chances whilst the oppo’s strong build up play was not matched by effective work in and close to the box. Mark TK made several good saves but wasn’t called on to match the outstanding stuff of recent weeks.
It was good to see the oppo field an appropriately aged senior vets team and that our good players arrived early leaving the Citroen 500 Three as the latecomers. Roy didn’t bother with the changing room waiting for his teammates in the dug out having only earlier declared his participation via the WhatsApp group. Would he get on the pitch?
As usual we created a good chance for the oppo Baby putting Mark under intense pressure with a back pass; fortunately the chance was spurned. 0-0 at halftime despite some good opportunities for both sides- the best Jon running in on goal but choosing (or forgetting?) to shoot.
Strong defence – another striking feature of recent weeks- was needed in the third quarter and Smudge was clearly in pain – a result of his testing dietary regime. Roy had changed his request for 30 minutes game time to half of that and so was able to replace Jon- who moved into the middle- on the right side sparing Smudge further exertion; within moments the deadlock was broken! Mike set Paul free on the left and he surged in from the byline to arrow the ball across goal where Roy finished well – his first touch! Next it was Jon striking into the far corner from outside the box- perhaps the bobble off the laces gave it the required flight and dip. Mike completed the scoring although thoughtfully refused to add to the scoreline despite only having the keeper to beat. Back to back wins- giving us a record this season similar to Spurs’ when they sacked Pochettino.
Smudger’s Star. (Mark had to go straight from the ground.) A very good team performance with a few standouts: Jon, the Squire and Mike- but Baby just gets it.
Players’ Player- chosen by Baby: Baby has gone with: ‘ A fine team performance.’ Diplomacy at its finest!
Goal of the Game: According to ‘Senior Management’- this means Smudge and Tim- ( a combined 125 years of wisdom(!!!!) )- Jon’s goal has to be discounted as he miss hit his shot. Therefore Roy De Bruyne secures this category- a nice pass from Mike set Paul free on the left; an excellent low cross found Roy DB steaming in at the back post to finish with his first touch of the match.
Moments and Quotes: A first clean sheet of the season! Steady!!
‘The curious thing about West Farleigh is that it’s virtually impossible to score when one on one with the keeper’. ( Mike was ‘waiting for the whistle’ .Hmmm.) Chris – what a defender- takes one in the nuts yet again.It’s always him- such commitment!!
‘Mike! Mike! Look!!!!’ Taj crossing the half way line as Mike advances into the box! Perhaps he should have passed it back!
Sponge Bob Doyley got the full 90, did well and had a classic flick up and overhead.
Complete professionalism from Tim calling a very laborious substitution that saw him get a full two minutes on the pitch.- maintaining his 100% pass completion rate for the season.
‘What happened to Western Samoa?’
Sausage and chips, good beer and Dogger in the pub- the Good Intent.
10.11.2019
Metrogas - Away.
W 3-2. (Mike, Taj, Paul T.)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Baby, Steve R, Jon, Smudge, The Squire, Graham, Paul T, Mike, Taj, Doyley, Scholesy. (Tim: Lino.)
Subbed: Taj, Doyley ( twice), Scholesy, Smudge, Paul T, Graham, The Squire, Steve R, Chris.
Never behind we deserved this excellent victory. Superb work by the back 3 was backed up across the pitch by maximum effort and commitment from all involved- with Mike leading the line well and Jon showing energy throughout. The Gas equalised twice but heads didn’t drop and the classy late winner defeated the youngest Metrogas side we’ve ever faced. Outstanding! And that includes the top banter in the bar! Reheated kebab anyone?
Players’ Player – chosen by Chris: Paul G – an all round commanding performance- two assists and breaking up so many dangerous Gas attacks. ( Baby a close runner up – strong in the tackle, important bursts forward and excellent covering.)
Mark’s Man: A great victory with good contributions from all with Paul G at the back getting the nod for MOM.
Goal of the Game: Paul T. Actually doing what we said we should playing easy passes to keep possession Paul G ran on to the ball towards the halfway line. Paul T timed his run into space well and collected G’s perfectly weighted pass. His first start touch gave him the position to strike precisely beyond the keeper the ball clipping the inside of the post on its way to the far corner.
OSCDT ((Top Passing): Two fine assists from Paul G. The first for the opener hit with the outside of the boot and sending Mike to run in on goal- good finish too. The second for the winning goal- described above.
Moments and Quotes: ‘I was given this pen- the only thing I got all day!’ Graham felt that he wasn’t given the ball enough. ‘There were no balls to the left’.
Plenty of Metrosexuals today: Baby, The Squire and Graham talk moisturisers and Steve R is concerned that his haircut might be too severe.
Taj puts us ahead for the second time smacking in Paul T’s corner from close range.
Two crucial moments at our end- one in each half- Mark makes a terrific save somehow getting the ball over the bar. ‘It could have gone anywhere to be fair’ was his post match verdict. After the break their main striker missed an open goal from inside the six yard box- apparently it took a bit of a bobble.
‘Now you’ve turned into a big time Charlie!’
The great Colin Powell is impressed by Smudge’s ‘ impressive’ role in front of the back three.
Sponge Bob Doyley? Too much time on the weights- he’s square.
There’s a slight suspicion in the squad that Scholesy is not fully match fit.
The most expensive bar of the season so far- but we did have plenty of chips and sausages……as long as the latter didn’t have the devastating qualities claimed for a leftover kebab by Mike.
We were also quite pleased with ourselves over our beers!
Metrogas - Away.
W 3-2. (Mike, Taj, Paul T.)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Baby, Steve R, Jon, Smudge, The Squire, Graham, Paul T, Mike, Taj, Doyley, Scholesy. (Tim: Lino.)
Subbed: Taj, Doyley ( twice), Scholesy, Smudge, Paul T, Graham, The Squire, Steve R, Chris.
Never behind we deserved this excellent victory. Superb work by the back 3 was backed up across the pitch by maximum effort and commitment from all involved- with Mike leading the line well and Jon showing energy throughout. The Gas equalised twice but heads didn’t drop and the classy late winner defeated the youngest Metrogas side we’ve ever faced. Outstanding! And that includes the top banter in the bar! Reheated kebab anyone?
Players’ Player – chosen by Chris: Paul G – an all round commanding performance- two assists and breaking up so many dangerous Gas attacks. ( Baby a close runner up – strong in the tackle, important bursts forward and excellent covering.)
Mark’s Man: A great victory with good contributions from all with Paul G at the back getting the nod for MOM.
Goal of the Game: Paul T. Actually doing what we said we should playing easy passes to keep possession Paul G ran on to the ball towards the halfway line. Paul T timed his run into space well and collected G’s perfectly weighted pass. His first start touch gave him the position to strike precisely beyond the keeper the ball clipping the inside of the post on its way to the far corner.
OSCDT ((Top Passing): Two fine assists from Paul G. The first for the opener hit with the outside of the boot and sending Mike to run in on goal- good finish too. The second for the winning goal- described above.
Moments and Quotes: ‘I was given this pen- the only thing I got all day!’ Graham felt that he wasn’t given the ball enough. ‘There were no balls to the left’.
Plenty of Metrosexuals today: Baby, The Squire and Graham talk moisturisers and Steve R is concerned that his haircut might be too severe.
Taj puts us ahead for the second time smacking in Paul T’s corner from close range.
Two crucial moments at our end- one in each half- Mark makes a terrific save somehow getting the ball over the bar. ‘It could have gone anywhere to be fair’ was his post match verdict. After the break their main striker missed an open goal from inside the six yard box- apparently it took a bit of a bobble.
‘Now you’ve turned into a big time Charlie!’
The great Colin Powell is impressed by Smudge’s ‘ impressive’ role in front of the back three.
Sponge Bob Doyley? Too much time on the weights- he’s square.
There’s a slight suspicion in the squad that Scholesy is not fully match fit.
The most expensive bar of the season so far- but we did have plenty of chips and sausages……as long as the latter didn’t have the devastating qualities claimed for a leftover kebab by Mike.
We were also quite pleased with ourselves over our beers!
03.11.2019
Canning Town. Home-The Quaggy.
Lost: 1-4. ( Mike )
Team: Mark TK, Taj, Matt, Chris, Graham, Jon, The Squire, Tonksy, Smudger, Roy, Mike, Steve R, Tim.
Subbed: Steve R, Tim, Tonksy and Roy- both injured.
A game played in good humour throughout- with two refs as Tonksy took over from Tim and occasionally remembered to blow his whistle, a comedy goal, a penalty, Smudge’s ultimate assist and good finishing from the oppo. Perhaps the scoreline did not reflect the game as we played well and showed commitment throughout - even though there was some poor passing and some chances spurned.
As enjoyable a 4-1 defeat as you’re likely to get!!
Mark’s Man: A workmanlike performance from all involved in a game played in good spirit- with our usual quota of injuries.Plenty in the frame for MOM though the nod goes to the Squire for his effort and energy.
Players’ Player: Chosen by Belle ( thank you for outstanding work running the line) : Graham- for his dedication to the team. He was due to head to the Valley at half time but played the full 90 before getting to Charlton in time to see Preston score the penalty that gave them a 1-0 win…..and then he had to go to work until 1 a.m.!!
Chosen by Tim: Mark TK – excellent game, good positioning, off his line quickly when necessary and a particularly good save from a long range, well struck swinging volley.
Goal of the Game: Smudge picked up the loose ball and advanced with purpose; with everyone expecting a fierce drive Smudge disguised the assist in such a way that Mike could have time to be onside and free. He finished calmly- eventually!
Top Tackle: Steve R- brilliantly timed, chasing back and sliding in to win the ball with a fine tackle that snuffed out a very threatening attack. That’s how to go about it in the box Chris!!!
Moments and Quotes: ‘I didn’t foul him!’ Taj is outraged when Tim awards a penalty. Chris immediately owned up to the assault which could be heard back in the clubhouse.
Opposition showboating: their skipper successfully dummies Jon by falling to the floor.
‘He has no tactical concept’ Who could that be about!?!?
A comedy equaliser on the stroke of half time: Matt smack’s a clearance into Smudge’s face, Taj miskicked and with MTK wrong footed and Smudge stunned their 72 year old striker banged it in.
A bit of a miss….Matt has a free header which is blocked, Taj nods it goal ward leading to a desperate save with the ball dropping to Mike who found the seemingly impossible trajectory to blaze over the bar.
The gaffer needs to have words: late and on the morning drop outs (thank goodness for Young Vet Matt Hearn answering the call) AND several late arrivals.
Finally can anyone recall so many misdirected passes from Smudge in a five minute spell?
Canning Town. Home-The Quaggy.
Lost: 1-4. ( Mike )
Team: Mark TK, Taj, Matt, Chris, Graham, Jon, The Squire, Tonksy, Smudger, Roy, Mike, Steve R, Tim.
Subbed: Steve R, Tim, Tonksy and Roy- both injured.
A game played in good humour throughout- with two refs as Tonksy took over from Tim and occasionally remembered to blow his whistle, a comedy goal, a penalty, Smudge’s ultimate assist and good finishing from the oppo. Perhaps the scoreline did not reflect the game as we played well and showed commitment throughout - even though there was some poor passing and some chances spurned.
As enjoyable a 4-1 defeat as you’re likely to get!!
Mark’s Man: A workmanlike performance from all involved in a game played in good spirit- with our usual quota of injuries.Plenty in the frame for MOM though the nod goes to the Squire for his effort and energy.
Players’ Player: Chosen by Belle ( thank you for outstanding work running the line) : Graham- for his dedication to the team. He was due to head to the Valley at half time but played the full 90 before getting to Charlton in time to see Preston score the penalty that gave them a 1-0 win…..and then he had to go to work until 1 a.m.!!
Chosen by Tim: Mark TK – excellent game, good positioning, off his line quickly when necessary and a particularly good save from a long range, well struck swinging volley.
Goal of the Game: Smudge picked up the loose ball and advanced with purpose; with everyone expecting a fierce drive Smudge disguised the assist in such a way that Mike could have time to be onside and free. He finished calmly- eventually!
Top Tackle: Steve R- brilliantly timed, chasing back and sliding in to win the ball with a fine tackle that snuffed out a very threatening attack. That’s how to go about it in the box Chris!!!
Moments and Quotes: ‘I didn’t foul him!’ Taj is outraged when Tim awards a penalty. Chris immediately owned up to the assault which could be heard back in the clubhouse.
Opposition showboating: their skipper successfully dummies Jon by falling to the floor.
‘He has no tactical concept’ Who could that be about!?!?
A comedy equaliser on the stroke of half time: Matt smack’s a clearance into Smudge’s face, Taj miskicked and with MTK wrong footed and Smudge stunned their 72 year old striker banged it in.
A bit of a miss….Matt has a free header which is blocked, Taj nods it goal ward leading to a desperate save with the ball dropping to Mike who found the seemingly impossible trajectory to blaze over the bar.
The gaffer needs to have words: late and on the morning drop outs (thank goodness for Young Vet Matt Hearn answering the call) AND several late arrivals.
Finally can anyone recall so many misdirected passes from Smudge in a five minute spell?
27/10/2019
Venue: Tennis court pitch
Oppo: Sanco
Score: 1-8 Scorer: Mike
Team: MTK - CHRIS GG STEVE R - TAJ JOHN PAUL T TONKSY SD - MIKE ROY
Sub: SMUDGER - The SQUIRE is 1st half ref
As has happened before in this fixture Sanco fielded a few too many youngsters and the score reflects this. To be honest we played some decent football, but without the required final ball, Sanco scored 3 fortunate goals in the first half and 1 decent effort, Mike's goal was a thing of beauty, decent football to get it to him, he then jinked his was past 3 defenders before rounding the keeper and slotting it home, ''bit like Ricky Villa'' he said, ''more like Ricky Gervais'' came the caustic retort from GG. Anyway 4-1 at h/t.
Smudger replaced Steve R, Roy took over in goal and MTK took up the whistle. As with the first half we played some nice football with no end result, we did manage 4 shots that all went over the bar, 12 points in the oval ball game but count for nowt here, Tonksy's effort being by far the best as nobody thought he could reach the goal from outside the box let alone get it over the bar! Steve R replaced Grandad again Taj, out last throw of the dice, alas, as with the first half Sanco scored 3 fortunate goals and a decent one. Not a good day at the office and the concensus was that our away fixture will be our last against this oppo.
Excellent turnout in the bar with only Doyley not partaking of a few or more beers in fact Josh from AH said ''if your like this when you lose what are you like when you win?'' this answer to that is just the same, we have a few amongst us who like an ale.
Quote of the day (maybe the season):Roy ''I want to play in central midfield, I would be just like Kevin de Bruyne''........silence, followed by gales of laughter.......only Roymond!
MOM: A clcose call but Mike get's it for the beautifully taken goal.
It does not get any easier with the next two games being Canning Town and Metrogas
Venue: Tennis court pitch
Oppo: Sanco
Score: 1-8 Scorer: Mike
Team: MTK - CHRIS GG STEVE R - TAJ JOHN PAUL T TONKSY SD - MIKE ROY
Sub: SMUDGER - The SQUIRE is 1st half ref
As has happened before in this fixture Sanco fielded a few too many youngsters and the score reflects this. To be honest we played some decent football, but without the required final ball, Sanco scored 3 fortunate goals in the first half and 1 decent effort, Mike's goal was a thing of beauty, decent football to get it to him, he then jinked his was past 3 defenders before rounding the keeper and slotting it home, ''bit like Ricky Villa'' he said, ''more like Ricky Gervais'' came the caustic retort from GG. Anyway 4-1 at h/t.
Smudger replaced Steve R, Roy took over in goal and MTK took up the whistle. As with the first half we played some nice football with no end result, we did manage 4 shots that all went over the bar, 12 points in the oval ball game but count for nowt here, Tonksy's effort being by far the best as nobody thought he could reach the goal from outside the box let alone get it over the bar! Steve R replaced Grandad again Taj, out last throw of the dice, alas, as with the first half Sanco scored 3 fortunate goals and a decent one. Not a good day at the office and the concensus was that our away fixture will be our last against this oppo.
Excellent turnout in the bar with only Doyley not partaking of a few or more beers in fact Josh from AH said ''if your like this when you lose what are you like when you win?'' this answer to that is just the same, we have a few amongst us who like an ale.
Quote of the day (maybe the season):Roy ''I want to play in central midfield, I would be just like Kevin de Bruyne''........silence, followed by gales of laughter.......only Roymond!
MOM: A clcose call but Mike get's it for the beautifully taken goal.
It does not get any easier with the next two games being Canning Town and Metrogas
Santos 20.10.19. Tennis Court Pitch
W 5-1. ( Doyley (2), Graham, Mike, Chris (pen ).)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Baby,Roy, Smudge, The Squire, Taj, Graham, Doyley, Mike. First subs: Dave T, Charlie, Tonksy. Ref: Tim.
In a Sentence: Comfortable – but patchy.
In a Word: Doyley!
Apart from a second quarter of chaos and confusion when it’s fair to say that the triple substitution led to a distinct loss of impetus we played some good stuff! In that difficult 20 when it wasn’t right, even with five in midfield we seemed to be short in the crucial areas; Paul G showed remarkable restraint – including when Roy passed the ball straight into touch, missing Paul who was a mere yard or two away. Doyley’s well taken header from a Graham cross completed a good move to give us an early-ish and deserved lead. However, we were pegged back having given the ball away as we looked to regain shape after the confusing substitutions. We re-established our dominance early in the second half and the goals flowed: Doyley got an excellent second powering a fine pull back into the roof of the net after skilful play down the right; Mike continued his fine form despite too much chat with the centre half, scoring well; Graham calmly – with eyes wide shut headed home Taj’s perfect cross and Chris knocked in the penalty after the keeper had hauled, chopped and dragged Taj to the floor. It could have been more but Doyley panicked and shot wildly but weakly when the ball fell to him just in the box but with the oppo not close enough to stop what should have been an easy run at the keeper.
Men of the Match
Mark’s choice: Paul G.
Belle’s choice: Baby
Baby’s choice: Graham……..No votes for Doyley despite him scoring for the first time this season- must have been the jug avoidance.
Quotes and Action
‘Welcome to my world.’ Roy – to an opponent who felt he’d been kicked a lot.
The Squire’s perfect series of no look passes- either straight into touch or to the oppo.
Tim sacked by Good Graham- a relief for everyone – especially Tim.
Podge is Iron Man- while he has one bit of the suit.
‘Who’s where in midfield!!?!’
It took a while but Mobile Dave delivered some good passes late on.
W 5-1. ( Doyley (2), Graham, Mike, Chris (pen ).)
Team: Mark TK, Chris, Paul G, Baby,Roy, Smudge, The Squire, Taj, Graham, Doyley, Mike. First subs: Dave T, Charlie, Tonksy. Ref: Tim.
In a Sentence: Comfortable – but patchy.
In a Word: Doyley!
Apart from a second quarter of chaos and confusion when it’s fair to say that the triple substitution led to a distinct loss of impetus we played some good stuff! In that difficult 20 when it wasn’t right, even with five in midfield we seemed to be short in the crucial areas; Paul G showed remarkable restraint – including when Roy passed the ball straight into touch, missing Paul who was a mere yard or two away. Doyley’s well taken header from a Graham cross completed a good move to give us an early-ish and deserved lead. However, we were pegged back having given the ball away as we looked to regain shape after the confusing substitutions. We re-established our dominance early in the second half and the goals flowed: Doyley got an excellent second powering a fine pull back into the roof of the net after skilful play down the right; Mike continued his fine form despite too much chat with the centre half, scoring well; Graham calmly – with eyes wide shut headed home Taj’s perfect cross and Chris knocked in the penalty after the keeper had hauled, chopped and dragged Taj to the floor. It could have been more but Doyley panicked and shot wildly but weakly when the ball fell to him just in the box but with the oppo not close enough to stop what should have been an easy run at the keeper.
Men of the Match
Mark’s choice: Paul G.
Belle’s choice: Baby
Baby’s choice: Graham……..No votes for Doyley despite him scoring for the first time this season- must have been the jug avoidance.
Quotes and Action
‘Welcome to my world.’ Roy – to an opponent who felt he’d been kicked a lot.
The Squire’s perfect series of no look passes- either straight into touch or to the oppo.
Tim sacked by Good Graham- a relief for everyone – especially Tim.
Podge is Iron Man- while he has one bit of the suit.
‘Who’s where in midfield!!?!’
It took a while but Mobile Dave delivered some good passes late on.
06/10/19
Old Tamps vs Mordor (AKA Avery Hill)
Score: 3-3 Scorers: Graham, Tonksy and Paul T
Another game against our old (and some not so old) adversaries. Having suffered a heavy defeat against ‘mad Dave’ and his cohorts a few weeks ago it was pleasing to see them shorn of one or two of their better players.
Meanwhile a power crazed Rogers and Smith seized control of selection much to the chagrin of the ‘late’ Roy and had the luxury of an excellent squad on paper. With MTK resting and reffing CTEBUK (Chris the excellent back up keeper) was coerced and cajoled into donning the gloves (just for the first half!)
Podge ‘the slightly madder’ was struggling with an ankle injury and although happy to start was uncertain how long he would last. This question was answered 30 seconds into the game as he twisted for the ball, slipped on a globule of goose shit and fell in a crumpled heap. Without any fuss he hobbled off and it later transpired off to A and E – ruptured achilles, 6 weeks in plaster, cancelled holiday and an angry Mrs Podge ( not sure if anyone has seen an angry Podge?)
The first half was a cagey affair with few chances -Tamps solid at the back except goal kicks where our attempts to play out produced some comedy gold and best chance for AH was a shot which deflected off Paul G and CTEBUK got down well to his left to palm away.
Pass of the match and highlight of the half was a raking crossfield 50 yard ball from Podge ‘the less mad and less injured’ onto the chest of Graham the golfer – sources tell me that AH had put Josh right midfield specifically to stop Graham attacking by fair means or foul (but mainly foul) On this occasion Graham escaped into the box, fooled the keeper into anticipating the cross before slicing the ball in at the near post like a bad tee shot on a par three pitch and putt. Up front Mike ably assisted by Roy was floundering like Hessie the Thames whale.
Half time 1-0 to the Tamps and Rogers and Smith began the task of sweet talking CTEBUK into staying in goal.
The 2nd half didn’t start well as Matt the rather sprightly AH forward (and freshly back from an Alberto Salazar training camp) picked the ball up on half way and as the Tamps midfield and defence parted like a 1970’s Ainsley hairstyle calmly slotted home the equaliser. Shortly afterwards a mix up with those playing offside and those not left Mark the bike free to put Avery Hill ahead. By now the game was beginning to open up and Technician Tonksey jinked into the area and unleashed a powerful shot which not only crept over the line but almost reached the net behind.
2-2 and anyone’s game but it was AH who scored next to make it 3-2 - back came Tamps and a moment of controversy – Graham went into the area with the ball and went down under a challenge from Stuart – penalty said Mark the ref, penalty said Tamps, penalty said the AH defence, yes I did give him a shove said Stuart – no penalty said Graham – I just fell over ,decision overturned and a rather apoplectic Paul G was not happy. Fortunately normal hostilities were resumed a few minutes later as Mad Dave raised his linesman’s flag for a contentious offside decision.
Tamps went searching for the equaliser and it came when AH’s reasonable Dave played a crossfield pass – Scholesey intercepted and played in Paul T who calmly slotted the ball into the bottom corner. Paul had a similar chance minutes later to win the game but an attempted first time lob went well wide.
Final score 3-3 which on balance was a fair result and nice not to lose to AH
Man of the match – honourable mentions to brothers John and Taj and hard work from Squire in the centre, clubman of the day and an excellent performance from CTEBUK but overall a goal and a constant threat my award goes to Graham plus of course the John Terry sportsmanship trophy.
A double surprise in the bar as firstly Aussie Brett announced he was in fact only 50 and then produced trays of roast pork and lamb accompanied by his wife’s lovely baps. Brett aside Tamps comfortably outlasted AH in the bar and were joined by Smudge as we awaited updates from Podge as Scholesey philosophised on the poignancy of the injury as he had only just finished reading Homer’s Iliad.
Get well soon Podge and hopefully see you in the bar before too long!
Steve Rogers
Old Tamps vs Mordor (AKA Avery Hill)
Score: 3-3 Scorers: Graham, Tonksy and Paul T
Another game against our old (and some not so old) adversaries. Having suffered a heavy defeat against ‘mad Dave’ and his cohorts a few weeks ago it was pleasing to see them shorn of one or two of their better players.
Meanwhile a power crazed Rogers and Smith seized control of selection much to the chagrin of the ‘late’ Roy and had the luxury of an excellent squad on paper. With MTK resting and reffing CTEBUK (Chris the excellent back up keeper) was coerced and cajoled into donning the gloves (just for the first half!)
Podge ‘the slightly madder’ was struggling with an ankle injury and although happy to start was uncertain how long he would last. This question was answered 30 seconds into the game as he twisted for the ball, slipped on a globule of goose shit and fell in a crumpled heap. Without any fuss he hobbled off and it later transpired off to A and E – ruptured achilles, 6 weeks in plaster, cancelled holiday and an angry Mrs Podge ( not sure if anyone has seen an angry Podge?)
The first half was a cagey affair with few chances -Tamps solid at the back except goal kicks where our attempts to play out produced some comedy gold and best chance for AH was a shot which deflected off Paul G and CTEBUK got down well to his left to palm away.
Pass of the match and highlight of the half was a raking crossfield 50 yard ball from Podge ‘the less mad and less injured’ onto the chest of Graham the golfer – sources tell me that AH had put Josh right midfield specifically to stop Graham attacking by fair means or foul (but mainly foul) On this occasion Graham escaped into the box, fooled the keeper into anticipating the cross before slicing the ball in at the near post like a bad tee shot on a par three pitch and putt. Up front Mike ably assisted by Roy was floundering like Hessie the Thames whale.
Half time 1-0 to the Tamps and Rogers and Smith began the task of sweet talking CTEBUK into staying in goal.
The 2nd half didn’t start well as Matt the rather sprightly AH forward (and freshly back from an Alberto Salazar training camp) picked the ball up on half way and as the Tamps midfield and defence parted like a 1970’s Ainsley hairstyle calmly slotted home the equaliser. Shortly afterwards a mix up with those playing offside and those not left Mark the bike free to put Avery Hill ahead. By now the game was beginning to open up and Technician Tonksey jinked into the area and unleashed a powerful shot which not only crept over the line but almost reached the net behind.
2-2 and anyone’s game but it was AH who scored next to make it 3-2 - back came Tamps and a moment of controversy – Graham went into the area with the ball and went down under a challenge from Stuart – penalty said Mark the ref, penalty said Tamps, penalty said the AH defence, yes I did give him a shove said Stuart – no penalty said Graham – I just fell over ,decision overturned and a rather apoplectic Paul G was not happy. Fortunately normal hostilities were resumed a few minutes later as Mad Dave raised his linesman’s flag for a contentious offside decision.
Tamps went searching for the equaliser and it came when AH’s reasonable Dave played a crossfield pass – Scholesey intercepted and played in Paul T who calmly slotted the ball into the bottom corner. Paul had a similar chance minutes later to win the game but an attempted first time lob went well wide.
Final score 3-3 which on balance was a fair result and nice not to lose to AH
Man of the match – honourable mentions to brothers John and Taj and hard work from Squire in the centre, clubman of the day and an excellent performance from CTEBUK but overall a goal and a constant threat my award goes to Graham plus of course the John Terry sportsmanship trophy.
A double surprise in the bar as firstly Aussie Brett announced he was in fact only 50 and then produced trays of roast pork and lamb accompanied by his wife’s lovely baps. Brett aside Tamps comfortably outlasted AH in the bar and were joined by Smudge as we awaited updates from Podge as Scholesey philosophised on the poignancy of the injury as he had only just finished reading Homer’s Iliad.
Get well soon Podge and hopefully see you in the bar before too long!
Steve Rogers
Oppo: Cudham Utd Venue: Old Wilsonians 29/9/19
Score: 1-0 Scorer: George (guesting)
Team: Paul G - Taj SR DI Chris Smudger - John The Squire Stewart (AH) Nick (Guesting) Podge Sr Doyley
Subbed: Only had 9 Tamps, Stewart from AH - Nick and George from Cudham
In a word: Finally!!
In a sentence: A hard fought victory!
Goal of the Game: George (guesting) - a good passing move ending with Doyley playing in George who finished with aplomb.
OSCDT (Top passing): Not one of our best passing performances as this was a game where we had to dig in and everyone did, with that in mind it has to be Doyley's assist for the goal.
Top Tackle: Podge sr, excellent sliding tackle on their rampaging forward, got the ball and in one movement was up and laying the ball off. Mention for Nick's (guesting) first half wipe out of a Cudham player, he took everything apart from the ball!!
Players' player: Chosen by SMUDGER: Podge sr, moved back into defence after 20 mins and played superbly, good distribution, excellent tackling and fine organisation of the defence.
Mark's MOM: Fantastic team performance, Paul G was very good in goal, Doyley had a very good game up front, but it just goes to Podge Sr for all of the above mention by Smudger.
Moments and quotes: No real time for frivolity in this game as it was all hands to the pump for the full 90mins.
''Why did we give them our best player?'' The Oppo after George (known as Judas George after the game) scored the winner
Score: 1-0 Scorer: George (guesting)
Team: Paul G - Taj SR DI Chris Smudger - John The Squire Stewart (AH) Nick (Guesting) Podge Sr Doyley
Subbed: Only had 9 Tamps, Stewart from AH - Nick and George from Cudham
In a word: Finally!!
In a sentence: A hard fought victory!
Goal of the Game: George (guesting) - a good passing move ending with Doyley playing in George who finished with aplomb.
OSCDT (Top passing): Not one of our best passing performances as this was a game where we had to dig in and everyone did, with that in mind it has to be Doyley's assist for the goal.
Top Tackle: Podge sr, excellent sliding tackle on their rampaging forward, got the ball and in one movement was up and laying the ball off. Mention for Nick's (guesting) first half wipe out of a Cudham player, he took everything apart from the ball!!
Players' player: Chosen by SMUDGER: Podge sr, moved back into defence after 20 mins and played superbly, good distribution, excellent tackling and fine organisation of the defence.
Mark's MOM: Fantastic team performance, Paul G was very good in goal, Doyley had a very good game up front, but it just goes to Podge Sr for all of the above mention by Smudger.
Moments and quotes: No real time for frivolity in this game as it was all hands to the pump for the full 90mins.
''Why did we give them our best player?'' The Oppo after George (known as Judas George after the game) scored the winner
OPPO: Erith Vets Date: 22/9/2019 Venue: Hospital ground Chislehurst
Score: 3-3 Scorers: Mikc(2), Taj
Team: DI CHRIS - TAJ PAUL G PODGE JR DAVE - JOHN THE SQUIRE TONKSY SMUDGER -
MIKE SD
Subbed: Only had the 11
In a Sentence: 11 good men and true
In a Word: Robbed!
Goal of the game: Taj - Worked from the back, involving 7 players and ending with John crossing the ball into the box and Taj gliding a header into the far corner - The brothers in Tandem.
OSCDT: Lots of excellent passing, mostly short, quick and precise which eventually led to Erith running out of steam. The Squire might want his assist for Mike's second to count,but to be honest it was just an up and under (he had been watching the rugby before the game).
Top Tackle: Some well timed sliding tackles from both Paul G and Dave, and some valiant attempts at tackles by Tonksy! overall it just goes to Paul G.
Players Player (Chosen by Smudger): Mike, 2 well taken goals and lots of selfless running and chasing. We won't mention the miss at 3-2......Oops!
Mark's MOM: As above, and for the same reasons
Moments and Quotes:
The Squire: ''You looked like a tiny monkey hanging off of him'' After Tonksy had tried (and failed)
to tackle their large forward.
Smudge: ''Doyley stop making the same runs as Mike''
Doyley: ''Just pass it''
Smudge: ''I can't cos you have closed the space''
Aide (Erith Defender) ''Smudge leave him alone, he doing my job for me (chuckles!)
Wayne (Erith m/f) ''We can't get out of our half, we've not had a corner all game, (face reddens)
WE'RE GIVING THEM TOO MUCH RESPECT'' (Always nice when the oppo know's they are
getting the runaround)
Due to injury and dropouts(?) our 14 on Saturday became 11 by Sunday, special thanks to DI Chris being the custodian of the net this week.
Score: 3-3 Scorers: Mikc(2), Taj
Team: DI CHRIS - TAJ PAUL G PODGE JR DAVE - JOHN THE SQUIRE TONKSY SMUDGER -
MIKE SD
Subbed: Only had the 11
In a Sentence: 11 good men and true
In a Word: Robbed!
Goal of the game: Taj - Worked from the back, involving 7 players and ending with John crossing the ball into the box and Taj gliding a header into the far corner - The brothers in Tandem.
OSCDT: Lots of excellent passing, mostly short, quick and precise which eventually led to Erith running out of steam. The Squire might want his assist for Mike's second to count,but to be honest it was just an up and under (he had been watching the rugby before the game).
Top Tackle: Some well timed sliding tackles from both Paul G and Dave, and some valiant attempts at tackles by Tonksy! overall it just goes to Paul G.
Players Player (Chosen by Smudger): Mike, 2 well taken goals and lots of selfless running and chasing. We won't mention the miss at 3-2......Oops!
Mark's MOM: As above, and for the same reasons
Moments and Quotes:
The Squire: ''You looked like a tiny monkey hanging off of him'' After Tonksy had tried (and failed)
to tackle their large forward.
Smudge: ''Doyley stop making the same runs as Mike''
Doyley: ''Just pass it''
Smudge: ''I can't cos you have closed the space''
Aide (Erith Defender) ''Smudge leave him alone, he doing my job for me (chuckles!)
Wayne (Erith m/f) ''We can't get out of our half, we've not had a corner all game, (face reddens)
WE'RE GIVING THEM TOO MUCH RESPECT'' (Always nice when the oppo know's they are
getting the runaround)
Due to injury and dropouts(?) our 14 on Saturday became 11 by Sunday, special thanks to DI Chris being the custodian of the net this week.
Old Tamponians Match Reports 2019-20.
‘Crystal Palace’ aka Paul’s lot. Tennis Court Pitch. 15.09.19.
( Mike.)
Team: Mark, Smudge, Chris, Baby, Roy, Jon, Steve L, The Squire, Jon, Steve D, Mike, Tonksy, Tim. (Reffing: Tim and The Squire.)
Subbed: Tonksy, Tim, Smudge, The Squire, Steve L.
In a Sentence: When will we win again?
In a Word: Laboured.
Goal of the Game: Obviously there’s just the one so no competition BUT it was well taken. Having created a fair few opportunities and at last sustaining some pressure we grabbed an equaliser. At the second attempt Steve L hooked the ball into the box and Mike read this well to guide a header beyond the reach of their excellent keeper – much to collective relief.
OSCDT. ( Top Passing): Thank goodness the Technician was back!
Terrific passing from Paul throughout the game setting up a series of chances ,opening up space. He was, of course, playing for the oppo.
Top Tackle: Jack on Doyley- the earth moved!
Players’ Player: ( chosen by Chris ) : Mark- two or three quality saves, including late on diving to his left to block at the post. Good positioning throughout, vital deflection of an accurate corner and solid distribution. Would have been another defeat but for excellent work in both halves.
Mark’s Man/Men: A hard fought game played in the right spirit and a draw was a fair result. Good performances all round ( that’s very generous! Ed.)- Mike leading the line well again and scoring another good goal.However, - and great to see him scuttling in the middle of the park again- Steve Lockett, rolling back the years, gets the nod this week.
Moments and Quotes: ‘I looked across and there was Doyley seeing if he could pinch an inch!’ This perhaps shows that we were largely a collection of individuals again – rather than a team.
‘ Steve, don’t do that!’ Tim as Ref reminds Steve L he shouldn’t be passing back to the keeper.
Chris – yet again- skilfully uses his ‘tackle’ and- as has been recorded before- got everything behind the ball!
Scholesy strikes the free kick! Mike also stood over the ball and expecting to take it. Boom – straight at the wall where Jack has to stoop to head it away.
Our starting midfield: Steve L on the right, the Squire in the middle, Scholesy on the left and Jon also on the left rather than the middle!
Roy explains clearly to other defenders why they should also be marking his man.
Tonksy in the bar name drops a Millwall legend: ‘Ben May!’ Anybody?!?
‘Who says I can’t play 90 minutes?’ Scholesy. Hmmmm.
Good to play against new oppo- though 3 of the team, as well as Paul, have played for us before- and glad to confirm a return fixture at the end of the season.
Crofton. Tennis Court Pitch. 08.09.19.
2-3. (Mike (2).)
Team: Mark, Steve R, Baby, Chris, Smudge, Roy, The Squire, Jon, Steve D, Paul, Mike, Scholesy, Charlie, Taj. Mitch: Lino. Tim: Ref.
Subbed: All- except- The Squire, The Keeper, Baby and Jon.
In a Sentence: Another one that got away.
In a Word: Patchy!!
Goal of the Game: Mike- ball played out from the back – Smudge to Baby, pass slipped between midfielders and defence. Mike beat the offside trap, closed in on the keeper, put him on his backside and placed the ball in the back of the net.
OSCDT. (Top Passing). Good stuff from the usual suspects: Baby’s long balls, Smudge keeping it moving, Paul setting players free. The issue though was taking the chances we created.
Top Tackle: Chris- using his guile, strength and size to ‘shield’ Jonny away from the ball.
Players’Player: chosen by Smudger: Jon. A welcome return- lots of running and tackling.
Mark’s Man/ Men: A disappointing defeat- not helped by yours truly! ( Yes, you’ll have better games Mark!). Good to see Jon back – and with his running and Mike’s two goals – joint winners this week.
Moments and Quotes: Special guest correspondent Amy writes: My Dad’s ( Baby) good run from defence to attack led to a very poor shot and some very strong language.
Good opportunities not taken- a couple of one on ones and a missed penalty- and Paul hit the bar.
Fitness levels and defensive application not fully there for a couple of players?
Ironic optimism from Smudge: ‘It’s in!’
Good job we play Crofton a few times each season- we’ve got to win the next one!! And then we’ll have a fuller more upbeat report.
2-3. (Mike (2).)
Team: Mark, Steve R, Baby, Chris, Smudge, Roy, The Squire, Jon, Steve D, Paul, Mike, Scholesy, Charlie, Taj. Mitch: Lino. Tim: Ref.
Subbed: All- except- The Squire, The Keeper, Baby and Jon.
In a Sentence: Another one that got away.
In a Word: Patchy!!
Goal of the Game: Mike- ball played out from the back – Smudge to Baby, pass slipped between midfielders and defence. Mike beat the offside trap, closed in on the keeper, put him on his backside and placed the ball in the back of the net.
OSCDT. (Top Passing). Good stuff from the usual suspects: Baby’s long balls, Smudge keeping it moving, Paul setting players free. The issue though was taking the chances we created.
Top Tackle: Chris- using his guile, strength and size to ‘shield’ Jonny away from the ball.
Players’Player: chosen by Smudger: Jon. A welcome return- lots of running and tackling.
Mark’s Man/ Men: A disappointing defeat- not helped by yours truly! ( Yes, you’ll have better games Mark!). Good to see Jon back – and with his running and Mike’s two goals – joint winners this week.
Moments and Quotes: Special guest correspondent Amy writes: My Dad’s ( Baby) good run from defence to attack led to a very poor shot and some very strong language.
Good opportunities not taken- a couple of one on ones and a missed penalty- and Paul hit the bar.
Fitness levels and defensive application not fully there for a couple of players?
Ironic optimism from Smudge: ‘It’s in!’
Good job we play Crofton a few times each season- we’ve got to win the next one!! And then we’ll have a fuller more upbeat report.
Avery Hill - 01/09/19
Score: 1- 6 Scorer: Mike
Team: Mark, Smudge, Chris, Baby, Graham, Steve R, The Squire, Podge, Steve D, Paul, Mike, Roy. (Tim: Ref.). Subbed: Roy, Chris (injured.)
In a Sentence: A game of two halves: it’s all about fine margins at this level!
In a Word: Collapse.
Goal of the Game: A visionary back pass by Smudge with Mark skipping over the ball so it narrowly missed the goal, yielding a corner. Further sharp intakes of breath then followed as Mark caught the resulting kick and threw it quickly to Doyley. The ball was swiftly moved through the midfield: Podge to Smudge and on to Paul. He got a good cross on which Roy, beating the defenders, nodded on for Mike to score with a well struck volley, the ball cannoning in off the far post. Goal of the season so far??!!?
Top Tackle: Steve R’s first half block is probably the pick. Less impressive – but quite amusing- was Baby being dispossessed by a particularly aggressive divot.
Chris got an important tackle in but was injured in the process.
OSCDT: (Top Passing.): Generally good and often quite threatening use of possession- we made chances but didn’t take them. Good set piece delivery too.
Players’ Player: (Chosen by Baby who had another excellent game but also made one or two critical mistakes that contributed to the harsh scoreline.)
Hard one to call today with most players having a good few minutes – but no stand out performer. It is a toss up between 4 : Podge, Paul, Mick and Asbo and it goes to……….Paul.
Mark’s Man/Men: A game of two halves. Good to see the Squire back and he gets the keeper’s nod for the ground covered. A disappointing result : it should never have been a 6-1 scoreline.
Moments and Quotes: Smudger’s strong fitness regime clearly tested with exemplary use of the ‘afterburners’. Josh’s disgraceful behaviour- having been sin binned for an elbow on Asbo- met with calmly promised violence by Baby.
At least a couple of poor choices in front of goal: the Squire unfortunately thought his left foot was right for the finish and – ‘When did you ever think you had finesse?’ (Smudge) – Doyley goes for a precise lob when a firm drive was required.
A very bad 15-20 minutes as we set up several opposition goals leading to Steve R’s rallying cry: ‘Let’s win the last 10 minutes boys- that’s all we’ve got left!’
If only… Graham’s excellent volley producing a ridiculous reaction save, Steve R also produces an unlikely save from their keeper, Mike heads against the bar, Paul shoots tamely when through on goal. But… youth, pace and an abundance of subs decisively shifted the game the oppo’s way after a very good and competitive first half. And…..they made several ridiculous penalty appeals against honest Smudger.
Toys out of the Pram: Doyley – the inaugural winner of this occasional category getting a bit hissy fit after some contact, giving away the odd free kick and seeing nothing wrong with his body grab on the oppo player! Grrrrr!
Score: 1- 6 Scorer: Mike
Team: Mark, Smudge, Chris, Baby, Graham, Steve R, The Squire, Podge, Steve D, Paul, Mike, Roy. (Tim: Ref.). Subbed: Roy, Chris (injured.)
In a Sentence: A game of two halves: it’s all about fine margins at this level!
In a Word: Collapse.
Goal of the Game: A visionary back pass by Smudge with Mark skipping over the ball so it narrowly missed the goal, yielding a corner. Further sharp intakes of breath then followed as Mark caught the resulting kick and threw it quickly to Doyley. The ball was swiftly moved through the midfield: Podge to Smudge and on to Paul. He got a good cross on which Roy, beating the defenders, nodded on for Mike to score with a well struck volley, the ball cannoning in off the far post. Goal of the season so far??!!?
Top Tackle: Steve R’s first half block is probably the pick. Less impressive – but quite amusing- was Baby being dispossessed by a particularly aggressive divot.
Chris got an important tackle in but was injured in the process.
OSCDT: (Top Passing.): Generally good and often quite threatening use of possession- we made chances but didn’t take them. Good set piece delivery too.
Players’ Player: (Chosen by Baby who had another excellent game but also made one or two critical mistakes that contributed to the harsh scoreline.)
Hard one to call today with most players having a good few minutes – but no stand out performer. It is a toss up between 4 : Podge, Paul, Mick and Asbo and it goes to……….Paul.
Mark’s Man/Men: A game of two halves. Good to see the Squire back and he gets the keeper’s nod for the ground covered. A disappointing result : it should never have been a 6-1 scoreline.
Moments and Quotes: Smudger’s strong fitness regime clearly tested with exemplary use of the ‘afterburners’. Josh’s disgraceful behaviour- having been sin binned for an elbow on Asbo- met with calmly promised violence by Baby.
At least a couple of poor choices in front of goal: the Squire unfortunately thought his left foot was right for the finish and – ‘When did you ever think you had finesse?’ (Smudge) – Doyley goes for a precise lob when a firm drive was required.
A very bad 15-20 minutes as we set up several opposition goals leading to Steve R’s rallying cry: ‘Let’s win the last 10 minutes boys- that’s all we’ve got left!’
If only… Graham’s excellent volley producing a ridiculous reaction save, Steve R also produces an unlikely save from their keeper, Mike heads against the bar, Paul shoots tamely when through on goal. But… youth, pace and an abundance of subs decisively shifted the game the oppo’s way after a very good and competitive first half. And…..they made several ridiculous penalty appeals against honest Smudger.
Toys out of the Pram: Doyley – the inaugural winner of this occasional category getting a bit hissy fit after some contact, giving away the odd free kick and seeing nothing wrong with his body grab on the oppo player! Grrrrr!
Charlton Rangers - 25/08/19
Score: 1-2 Scorer: Mike
In a word: Robbed!
In a sentence: Far too hot for football!
Team: MTK - TAJ CHRIS PODGE jr SR - SCHOLESY TONKSY GG SD - ROY MIKE
Subs: CHARLIE SMUDGER JIM
Ref: Mitch/60mins - MTK/30mins
As we had feared the oppo drafted in some youthful players to supplement their squad, they had the oldest (70yrs) and youngest (28yrs) players and they both played about 30mins each. Despite this we had most of the game and played the better football. The oppo had a lively front pair, one with a very nice touch, the other who shot on site, despite this MTK didn't make a save and was beaten by a very good finish from Mr SOS, we inturn had their keeper making a few full length saves (he always has a very good game against us) GG bring out the best with a swerving drive from fully 25yards, SR had a couple of good efforts (both narrowly wide) but we went in at h/t 0-1. Scholesy pulled a groin about 5 mins from h/t and Taj had a recurrence of an achilles injury which meant both being replaced by Jim and Smudger.
The 2nd half was much the same as the first, excellent build up play thrwarted by a goalkeeper having a blinder. There was was much subbing in the 2nd half due to the immense heat, Charlie was on for GG, and happily completed a good 30mins. Finally we got a deserved equaliser, short pass from Smudge to Podge jr who sent a raking pass through the centre of their defence which Mike duly put away (up and running for another 30?). Mitch was allowed a 30 min cameo by MTK
and Chris took over the keeping duties, the last 15 mins were hard, the heat draining everyone and a draw looked the likely outcome. Then after a good move down the right Mike connected with a brilliant overhead kick, it crashed onto the inside of the post round the back of the keeper but somehow stayed out! with about 30secs remaining a short pass from Tonksy was intercepted by their very young centre back who ran 30 yards with it before a deflected pass went straight to
their forward who crossed to the far post where it was bundled into the net. We didn't even get the ball out of the goal before MTK blew the final whistle, a few choice words were muttered by all as there was no way we deserved to lose.
Quotes: "For fuck sake finish it" - Smudge after Mike's brilliant overhead effort
Roy: Too numerous to mention, and all managed to get someone's back up (SR, Chris, Charlie.....)
Scholesy: "Maybe if I put my thigh banadage on it will help" - (not really it's a groin strain)
Score: 1-2 Scorer: Mike
In a word: Robbed!
In a sentence: Far too hot for football!
Team: MTK - TAJ CHRIS PODGE jr SR - SCHOLESY TONKSY GG SD - ROY MIKE
Subs: CHARLIE SMUDGER JIM
Ref: Mitch/60mins - MTK/30mins
As we had feared the oppo drafted in some youthful players to supplement their squad, they had the oldest (70yrs) and youngest (28yrs) players and they both played about 30mins each. Despite this we had most of the game and played the better football. The oppo had a lively front pair, one with a very nice touch, the other who shot on site, despite this MTK didn't make a save and was beaten by a very good finish from Mr SOS, we inturn had their keeper making a few full length saves (he always has a very good game against us) GG bring out the best with a swerving drive from fully 25yards, SR had a couple of good efforts (both narrowly wide) but we went in at h/t 0-1. Scholesy pulled a groin about 5 mins from h/t and Taj had a recurrence of an achilles injury which meant both being replaced by Jim and Smudger.
The 2nd half was much the same as the first, excellent build up play thrwarted by a goalkeeper having a blinder. There was was much subbing in the 2nd half due to the immense heat, Charlie was on for GG, and happily completed a good 30mins. Finally we got a deserved equaliser, short pass from Smudge to Podge jr who sent a raking pass through the centre of their defence which Mike duly put away (up and running for another 30?). Mitch was allowed a 30 min cameo by MTK
and Chris took over the keeping duties, the last 15 mins were hard, the heat draining everyone and a draw looked the likely outcome. Then after a good move down the right Mike connected with a brilliant overhead kick, it crashed onto the inside of the post round the back of the keeper but somehow stayed out! with about 30secs remaining a short pass from Tonksy was intercepted by their very young centre back who ran 30 yards with it before a deflected pass went straight to
their forward who crossed to the far post where it was bundled into the net. We didn't even get the ball out of the goal before MTK blew the final whistle, a few choice words were muttered by all as there was no way we deserved to lose.
Quotes: "For fuck sake finish it" - Smudge after Mike's brilliant overhead effort
Roy: Too numerous to mention, and all managed to get someone's back up (SR, Chris, Charlie.....)
Scholesy: "Maybe if I put my thigh banadage on it will help" - (not really it's a groin strain)
